Learning to See Yourself Differently: Pregnancy, Body Image, and the Sacred Transition into Motherhood

Jul 27

Listen to the Podcast!

Pregnancy has a way of changing everything.

Yes, your body changes. Your routines change. Your relationships shift. But perhaps the biggest transformation isn’t one you can see from the outside at all.

You’re becoming a mother.

That transition is beautiful, exciting, overwhelming, and sometimes surprisingly complicated. Many parents tell me they expected the physical changes of pregnancy, but they didn’t expect how much their relationship with their own body would change along the way.

On a recent podcast episode, I had the privilege of speaking with underwater maternity photographer Caroline White about the deeper meaning behind her incredible work. What started as a conversation about maternity photography quickly became something much bigger: a discussion about body image, self-compassion, and learning to honor the incredible work our bodies are doing.

It’s a conversation I think every expecting parent deserves to hear.

Pregnancy Is More Than Growing a Baby

We spend a lot of time talking about what pregnancy looks like.

How big the bump should be.
How much weight you should gain.
Whether your feet swell.
Whether you “bounce back.”

But we don’t spend nearly enough time talking about what pregnancy means.

Pregnancy is a transition unlike any other. You’re not simply waiting for your baby to arrive. You are becoming someone new.

Every kick, every stretch mark, every ache, every moment of uncertainty is part of that transformation.

As a birth and postpartum doula, I see this every day. Parents often arrive focused on preparing for labor, organizing the nursery, or researching baby gear. Those things certainly matter, but one of the greatest preparations we can make is learning to trust ourselves and appreciate what our bodies are accomplishing.

When Did We Stop Seeing Pregnancy as Sacred?

Somewhere along the way, pregnancy became something we’re expected to “get through.”

We count the weeks.
We compare our bodies.
We criticize our changing shape.
We worry about how quickly we’ll lose the baby weight.

It’s no wonder so many parents struggle with pregnancy body image.

The truth is, your body isn’t failing you. It’s doing something extraordinary.

Your heart is working harder. Your blood volume is increasing. Your organs are making room for a growing human. Your body is creating an entirely new person while simultaneously preparing to nourish, protect, and birth them.

That’s not something to criticize. That’s something to stand in awe of.

The Lesson Water Can Teach Us About Birth

One of my favorite parts of my conversation with Caroline was the way she described photographing people underwater. She explained that beautiful underwater portraits don’t come from forcing the perfect pose. They come from letting go.

The more someone fights the water, the harder the experience becomes. The more they soften, breathe, and allow themselves to move with the water instead of against it, the more natural and beautiful the images become.

I couldn’t help but smile because birth often works the same way.

Birth asks us to surrender.
Not to give up.
Not to stop advocating for ourselves.

But to release the illusion that we can control every moment.

When we soften our bodies, breathe through uncertainty, and allow ourselves to work with labor instead of constantly resisting it, we often discover strengths we didn’t know we had.

That doesn’t mean birth is easy. It means that trust can become one of our greatest tools.

Your Body Is Not a Before Picture

Our culture spends an incredible amount of energy convincing women that every version of their body should be compared to another.

Before pregnancy.
During pregnancy.
After pregnancy.

As though one version is somehow more worthy than another.

But your pregnant body isn’t a “before.”

It isn’t something to fix later.
It isn’t a temporary inconvenience on the way back to who you used to be.
It’s part of your story.

The stretch marks, the changing hips, the fuller breasts, the softer belly. These are evidence of a body adapting in remarkable ways.

That doesn’t mean you have to love every change immediately. Many parents don’t. Body image is complicated, especially during pregnancy and postpartum.

But what if the goal wasn’t loving every inch of your body overnight? What if the goal was simply becoming a little kinder to yourself?

A Different Way to Practice Self-Compassion

During our conversation, Caroline shared an idea I absolutely loved. Instead of demanding that you suddenly love your body, approach it as an experiment. Notice the way you speak to yourself. Try replacing one critical thought with a curious one.

Instead of: “I hate my stomach.” → Try: “This body is growing my baby.” Or “I’m learning to appreciate what my body is doing.”

It may feel awkward at first. That’s okay. Self-compassion is a practice, not a destination. The way we speak to ourselves matters because eventually those words become the stories we believe.

Your Children Are Watching

One of the things that struck me most during our conversation was thinking about the messages our children absorb.

Long before they understand nutrition or health, they learn how to talk about bodies by listening to us. They hear whether we criticize ourselves. They notice whether we celebrate what our bodies can do or only focus on how they look.

Imagine the gift we give our children when they grow up hearing things like:

“My body carried you.”
“My body deserves kindness.”
“My body is strong.”

Those are lessons they’ll carry into adulthood.

Listen to the Full Conversation

If this topic resonated with you, I hope you’ll listen to the full podcast episode with Caroline White. Her perspective on pregnancy, art, motherhood, and body image is thoughtful, inspiring, and unlike anything I’ve heard before.

And if you’re looking for compassionate, evidence-based support during pregnancy, postpartum, or your baby’s first year, I’d love to walk alongside you. Whether you need birth preparation, postpartum guidance, infant sleep support, or ongoing first-year coaching, you don’t have to figure it all out alone. You can learn more about my services and explore free resources at DoulaDeb.com.

Because becoming a parent isn’t just about welcoming a baby. It’s about learning to see yourself with the same compassion, wonder, and grace that your child already sees in you.

Podcast Guest:

Caroline White, Underwater Photographer

Caroline White is a San Diego and Los Angeles-based photographer and videographer specializing in personal branding and underwater maternity photography. Caroline has been an artist and creative her whole life and a professional photographer for 21 years. She also does family photography, pet photography, boudoir, fine-art nudes, corporate, headshots, and sailing and yachting photography. She and her work have been featured or seen in Business Insider, Artnet, Metro UK, CBS, Animal Planet, and NBC. She is best known for photographing Bernie Sanders, Marianne Williamson, Tony Robbins, Marie Forleo, Amy Porterfield, and Chalene Johnson. She travels often to Orange County, La Jolla, Beverly Hills, NYC, Chicago, Sonoma, and Europe for both clients and adventures. Her work has been exhibited in Spain, Southern California, Chicago, and Sarasota.